My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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