I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize