tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
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Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
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I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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