You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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