I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize