so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think my cat just said my name.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize