so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
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