There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
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