is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
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He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
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I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
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