Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize