My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize