you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shattered a urinal.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Randomize