There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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