I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Dicks are not precious.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize