He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize