dude i'm inner monologue high
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
The air was thick with penises
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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