Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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