Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
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