She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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