i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
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