defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize