then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
sarcasm needs its own font
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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