i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
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