Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize