Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize