When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize