My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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