Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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