remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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