He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
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Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
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At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I need to sanitize my soul.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize