I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize