I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
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he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
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So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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