Small penises have feelings too.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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