I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize