I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize