I would go down on you faster than GM stock
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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