hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I think my moral compass just broke
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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