I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Gay?
German.
Pity.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize