i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
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