When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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