he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize