matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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