I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize