Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
