Yo dont text me then not text me
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
