I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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