i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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