I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
we should paint friendship bongs
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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