Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize