Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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